Pulled in or lived out

I have been working with people as long as I have been alive. As a child, I tried to control my parents by crying really loud. As a toddler and elementary student, I would throw temper tantrums. Then, as a teenager, one of my first jobs was umpiring girls fast pitch softball. All of the sudden, I went from throwing tantrums and yelling for control to diffusing those tantrums and raised voices. Things have not changed over the years. I officiate High School Football and often say that it is relaxing to get yelled at by the coaches and hear the incessant "encouragements" screamed by High School students. I just know there are not too many eternal consequences for not calling "holding" in the middle of a game.

It's when I get into my other "real" job that I struggle. As a pastor, I get a chance to walk with people through the ups, downs, joys and defeats of life. In addition, I consider myself a leader called by God to lead people on God's mission to redeem people. I always believed everyone in church got along with each other because we were all focused on the main thing.

Back in the real world, however, I have been: threatened with lawsuits because someone would not remove their camper from the church parking lot, cussed out for disagreements over decisions made, accused of highjacking the church and so much more. Are you kidding me?

Of course, these things do not stop at the church doors. The world is filled with people who want to argue their point, make sure their view is seen as right and have their voice heard above all others. Just listen to talk radio, watch reality tv and read Facebook during a Presidential election year. There are days that I find myself wanting to jump in and set everyone straight on what the truth, right and wrong things really are...in my humble opinion.

Then I realize that I am being pulled into the fight rather than living out my calling. My prayer has become: Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Do not let my heart be drawn to what is evil so that I take part in wicked deeds along with those who are evil doers; do not let me eat their delicacies. (Psalm 141:3-4). When I argue, I am being pulled in to a fight that I can not win; a win that would only satisfy my ego. So, this life is more about living out the righteousness of Jesus, rather than the right-ness of Jason. I must find myself living out the call of Christ to represent his love to everyone ~ even in the midst of disagreement.